Die, Stupid People, Die Redux
Remember this post? Here’s more of the online variety. They’re probably more annoying than stupid, but whatever.
Websites with embedded audio. Whoever the hell thought embedding audio on a website is a great idea has obviously never been scared shitless by sudden loud music blaring from his speakers at 3 a.m. in the morning. Not funny.
Website layouts with blinding colour combinations. Here’s the thing. I surf to have fun, relax and generally enjoy myself. I DO NOT surf to give myself bleeding eyes. Fire engine red, bright orange and lime green do not make soothing colour combinations. See, if your friend told you your site looks awesome? He’s totally lying. Buy a clue. Consult a colour wheel.
Page transitions. It’s probably cool if you’re 13 years old with a Xanga site but it’s also Very Annoying. Just don’t do it.
Google is your best friend. I go to all these forums and see people asking all these stupid questions (omg ive neva seen a green apple wat iz it? lololol) that can probably be answered with about 3 seconds of googling. If you’re smart enough to figure out how to post in a forum, then you should be smart enough to just fucking google it.
Considering that there’re probably more stupid people on this planet than there are sheep in New Zealand, I should perhaps serialise my stupid people rants. I’m sure I’ll never run out of material.
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Translation – Lis hates all of MySace.
Oh no, don’t get me started on MySpace!
And that was only the Xanga h8.
This one’s for you…
http://web.archive.org/web/20050103020205/http://www.seizurerobots.com/
I’m going to kill you! I can still see the flashing when I close my eyes!
LOL, I think I may be an ofender though! Oh well I love your site it’s totally cool.
I did check out your blog and left with my eyes and ears still intact so I guess you’re cool? Heh.
Not that I post stupid questions… But some do post these as a way to begin a conversation (I am hoping this?). I would never have thought the 3 am scenario was funny until I read your description (that’s why I turn off the sound on pc when I go to ESPN’s site – they run video clip without you wanting to see or hear them).
Well, I guess that’s one way to break the ice. Me? I prefer deep and meaningful discussions about important hot topic issues that affect us all like who’s left on American Idol or my personal favourite, “is Simon growing man-boobs?”.
I’ve since learnt (the hard way, obviously) to turn down the speakers when I’m surfing in the middle of the night. No need to learn the lesson a second time.
Pretty funny, I lol ed!
Now this is a great post! Very well said. Pat yourself on the back.
I have gotten so sick of suddenly finding these strange noises in the room with me when I’m home alone or surfing at 1:33 AM (as it is now) that I leave the speakers off all the time unless I have something I want to hear. (It ticks my wife off, though, when she’s using the computer, but not enough (yet) that she’s threatening divorce or anything, so I’ll take my chances.)
But even more than the alarming music blaring in my ears, the thing I really agree with is about Googling. It stuns me how some of these people have figured out how to use a keyboard but can’t figure out how to get to or use Google. Morons!
Love it! The last site I was on scared the crap out of me as it blasted out some horrendous melodic tone all of a sudden and I groped desperately for the speakers that I’d forgotten were on!
For the sake of humanity there should be a web wide ban!
I used to have the mp3 player. After shocking myself to death when the player just suddenly blasted in the office, enuff said! Lucky my boss didn’t send me a memo…
Emm, glad you liked it! :)
Techsplorer, I think forums should make that a bannable offence. Saves me the trouble of wading through the crap to find that one good post.
Geedos, a web wide ban is a fantastic idea. Where do I sign up?
Nessa, heh, I had that same experience, except it was on a bus. I literally jumped out of my seat.
You are so right about these annoyances, ruining one’s web surfing experience.
GRRR…i hate embedded audio. Its all good and nice if you have fast broadband, cause the music comes on immediately, but if you have broadband that sucks or dialup, expect BLARE! then silence then BLARRRRRR! then silence… GRRRR!
I hate websites with embedded audio, they drive me nuts!!
Thomas, that sounds like a website with hiccups. Heh.
So many embedded audio h8ers out there! We should all band together and start a movement with some catchy name like the Anti-Hidden-Audio-Which-Always-Scare-The-Crap-Outta-Me movement.
“Websites with embedded audio. Whoever the hell thought embedding audio on a website is a great idea has obviously never been scared shitless by sudden loud music blaring from his speakers at 3 a.m. in the morning. Not funny.”
Its the WORST! and HORRIFYING!
but your spin on it made me laugh!
It is, isn’t it? I’m still waiting for the web wide ban on embedded audio to happen.
Embedded audio is definitely one of my biggest pet peeves. Considering I have headphones attached to my head about 99% of the time while I’m at the computer, it’s really not cool. It always seems to be the worst possible music too. I think embedding audio and bad taste in music go hand in hand.
Mike’s last blog post..A little link love – Week 30
Tell me about it. Speakers are bad enough. I don’t think I’ll survive the shock (either from the volume or the bad taste) if I was using my headphones.
Embedded audio also “grinds my gears!” too! I spend a lot of time working on my laptop and I find it really annoying as it totally interferes with listening to music and sometimes I have so many windows open that I can’t find the one with the tedious adverts on it!