Spoilers. I think most people belong to two camps when it comes to spoilers. They’re either of the “spoil me and I’ll skin you alive with my bare hands and k33l j00 d3ad” variety or the “meh, who cares? I’ve more important things to think about such as is that a pimple on my face?” sort. I belong to both and neither. When it comes to television, I love to be spoiled. In fact, I stalk Television Without Pity on a regular basis. Well, this is mostly because we usually get US TV shows months after they’ve been shown. Sometimes whole seasons have ended before we get to watch them on TV. The only shows screened live are the scripted reality shows and I’m not a fan of those. Ok, I used to watch American Idol but I stopped when I realised Simon’s manboobs were growing bigger and bigger. I was afraid they were gonna poke my eyes out some day. Hey, if Sadako could crawl out of a TV, Simon could jolly well blind me from one too. I know I could probably download watch the TV shows in a timely fashion from the internet and stuff but I’m not crazy about watching TV on a screen that’s smaller than 20″. I like to be able to see every pore on hot Peter Petrelli’s face. We were slightly more than one month behind US for Heroes so I’ve already read the review for the last episode before it was shown. Still, you can only appreciate how stupid crazy the scene where the super hot Petrelli brothers flew into the sky looked after you’ve seen it.

Now movies on the other hand is a big no-no when it comes to spoilers. I’m not usually a violent person but seriously, if you try to spoil me, I’ll kick you in the balls at least three times. While wearing boots. With metal studs. And that’s before I really start hurting you.

Books are in a grey area. Most of the time I don’t mind being spoiled. Hell, I was spoiled for Harry Potter and the Half- Blood Prince and nobody ended up dead from massive blood loss in the balls. Which brings me to this. I’ve somehow managed to get my hands on an advance copy** of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows and have debated whether I should post the spoiler online. I even did the whole flower-petal-peeling thing. You know, should I? Shouldn’t I? I decided I should but only if protective measures are put in place so that if you don’t want to, you won’t read it accidentally. So here goes, scroll down for spoiler.

Continue scrolling…

And scrolling…

Look! It’s a bird!

Are you ready for the spoiler?

You can’t handle the spoiler!

Almost there…

What did you have for breakfast? I had a tuna bun. It was yummy.

This is it. You’ve reached the point of no return. Highlight the text in between the spoiler warning lines. (Author’s Note: I’ve no idea if this works in a RSS reader so you have my sincerest apologies if you’re accidentally spoiled.)

–SPOILER WARNING–
There’s some kid named Harry and he does magic and stuff.
–SPOILER WARNING–

** Except not really. You didn’t think I’d actually be able to get my hands on one, did you?

Enjoy your book tomorrow!

Edit: Hello people who came via Google, the hallows are deathly, not deadly. This is why you ended up here. Do a search for “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Spoilers” instead.